Getting used to Living in a New Home

 

I want to talk about settling in the home as a disabled person. I say that because after the many moves over 14 months, this blog was on a semi-break/ hiatus because of not knowing how long I was to be in one place. I mentioned it in other posts such as What has been happening   But when I moved into my final home. I wrote a quick post a few months ago. about what I struggled with and mentioned the list below

This is a list of things that I wish I had known before moving into my final home. 

• Involve the person with cerebral palsy in the planning process as much as possible. This will help them feel more in control and invested in the new home.

• List any accessibility needs, to be addressed in the new home. This could include wider doorways, bathroom grab bars, or a lower kitchen counter.

• Start unpacking and setting up the new home one room at a time. This will help to avoid feeling overwhelmed.

• Familiarise the person with cerebral palsy with the layout of the new home. This will help them feel more comfortable and independent.

• Be patient and allow plenty of time for the person with cerebral palsy to adjust to the new home.

For me, because of the previous moves, I was in limbo which meant that I could adapt relatively quickly for the emergency homes. but this is the home I plan to live in permanently. My body could not adjust quickly to the realisation that it could relax. And not worry about falling and knowing was safe. 

it has taken months to get used to the idea that I could put my hands on the wall to steady myself or use any of my equipment such as the home-help trolly to help me walk around and learn the differences in the surfaces of each room. I mentioned this in an earlier post A few months. It still stands as valid now as it did then because my body still hasn’t completely relaxed into the realisation it's safe. I think that is because I am waiting for the final things to happen to make it finally ready for the future. That's okay though as I know that these are going to happen but I don’t know when. I'm just going to have to compromise until then. 

I hope you took note of the list in either post as I found that it was indispensable for the transition so far. I just wish my body would catch up with the reality that I have been living in a safe place for it for some time now and it won't relax properly consistently. 

Behind the Headlines: a review of ;Small Pleasures by Clare Chambers

I

had already mentioned this book in my previous book review of “Hamnet” by Maggie O'Farrell. Here is my review.

Synopsis:

This book is fiction although is slightly connected to a true event although very slight. It is about a possible virgin birth and all the events surrounding it.

It is centred around the main character Jean who's 39 and a journalist. And her want for the truth of a possible virgin birth. The difficulty is that it is set in 1956 when women are still considered to be at home looking after family unless they are single or have no children.

Themes:

Unlike the previous book, this has two themes that are different from it and they are

• Love

• Virgin birth

• History

• Sexuality

Love:

The attitude towards love at this time was still declared illegal for people of the same sex to love each other. Which is why I embolden the virgin birth and sexuality. There also is the romance of Jean and another character which would be heterosexual.

Virgin birth:

This is a complex theme as this is before the time of IVF and all the medical advancements that are available now. However, the fact that a character believes that they may have conceived a daughter through immaculate conception is unlikely. But the fact that they were at a hospital run by nuns when they conceived makes them question the event.

History:

This is a lovely theme as similarly to the previous book it is based around an essence of truth. The story at the end is the real Lewisham train accident that happened. However, the way the history is also linked in by the excerpts of newspaper articles from local papers throughout the chapters.

Sexuality:

This theme is what I would say was the main theme because of the love of Jean and another other character. More than that though it's the subtlety or lack of subtlety of the love between the character who gave birth to the child and another girl who had been at the hospital at the same time.

My thoughts:

This was a lovely book. I really enjoyed reading it. In fact, I couldn't put it down. It was such a pleasure

Is Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell worth your time?

Since moving into a new home, I needed to start getting involved in the community so I joined the local library book club. 

Although there was one book that was to be read I was to start with the book that the group had read before and that was Small Pleasures by Clare Chambers. 

However, I am considering starting to write my blog again more consistently while reading that book. I decided to start with the book that they had read before that. That was Hamnet by Maggie O'Farrell. So I will begin.

 What is the synopsis?

The book is set in Elizabethan times when Queen Elizabeth the 1st on the throne. It is about a woman and her family. It begins with the loss of a child called Hamnet and then goes back to when the woman Agnes falls pregnant before marriage. Then loops back to the present time for her and how she deals with the loss and the family's own reaction.

The themes:

There are a group themes for this novel and they are:

• Death

• Love

• History

• Family dynamics

Death:

This is an obvious one with the death of Hamnet. So it is easy to see. Although a short one.

Love:

This one is not such an obvious one although it is combined with death because of Hamnet's death but also the early love between Agnes and her lover who becomes her husband while pregnant. And when they drift apart.

History:

This one is again so obvious as Maggie O'Farrell has used language and description as well as setting. She used a specific dateline of 1596 as this is when the child Hamnet died as a main link for the entire book.

Family dynamics:

This theme is a little more subtle than the others but it is the biggest one. The reason for this is many people are secondary characters. These included Agnes’s husband, siblings, children, parents and in-laws. 

My Thoughts:

For me, this was a tough book to start especially with the split in the beginning. But I pushed through and enjoyed it. Because I heard about it before reading it. I was intrigued by how Maggie O'Farrell wrote it. She used the historical truth as a basis. It is based on the time of William Shakespeare's life and the actual death of his son who is called Hamnet. Maggie also told the truth from Agnes, his first wife's point of view. Although much of the story is fiction, those bits are based on truth. So is it worth it?  Well, that is up to you! I did enjoy many of the subplots as well as the main one.