Like the last post, life had been pretty calm, and able to do things calmly, with no real stress. I had started to get the sensation of anxiety coming back. I knew that the calmness was beginning to come to the end. I know while writing, this. It is only short term. The feelings being back made me know that this will also affect me. By causing problems with my type of Cerebral Palsy.
October
This month was the same although the sense of anxiety was getting stronger and stronger. I had been feeling more and more anxious about the future. I did do the 1st step which was a kind of relief. Yet the uncertainty of the future means my cerebral palsy has been affected. Yet I don’t know how just yet.
November
This month again had been a mixed bag of feelings. I was able to get Christmas almost completed before the actual event. The stress was beginning to start showing itself. Through tightness of muscles and the inability to wind down.
December
This month was the end of what was a fairly good year before a new year which is a transitional one, to say the least.
Final ideas
The whole year had been a good one on the whole. Cerebral palsy has been good and life despite the pandemic was good this year
This is the end of the series on the year in retrospect.
This is the continuing series of posts regarding my thoughts about the year. For myself before moving on about this year.
May
This month was quiet and was a month where I continued doing the things that made me feel better and recovering from the feelings of anxiety and fear that had been over me for so long. I didn’t realise until recently how pressured I had been whilst living in the previous place with the family.
Covid hadn’t disrupted me that much as I hadn’t been out much during the winter and early spring. As the weather affects the way cerebral palsy causes issues for me in the season. So I was enjoying a bit of freedom but still limiting the amount I went out because of the pandemic
June
This month was much the same as before and started looking after myself mentally and physically in some ways that I can. This included and still includes the following:
Manicure
Lashes tinted
Eyebrows tinted and tidied
Hair cut
July
Again this was similar to the previous month. So it was relatively calm and the kids were coming to the end of their school year. The thing was the ability to say yes to what the kids wanted rather than say no all the time.
August
This month was the same as July in the sense that I was able to say yes to the kids, myself and my hubby.
Final thoughts
There was lots of freedom for me despite the pandemic. So I feel privileged to have been able to do the things I can while there are so many who have lost their jobs or life.
Similarly to 2020, 2021 was a bit of a crazy one with the pandemic causing havoc to everyone in some way or another. Too many lives have been changed by this in unimaginable ways.
Businesses have had to change their ways in how they run. However, I’m not here to talk about the way they were changed. But how the pandemic affected me in the last year.
January
We had just come out of one lockdown and managed to move house just before the beginning of the new year. I wrote about this in a couple of posts such as and had been trying to extend my movement because we are in a bigger place. The change although good, on the whole, threw some unexpected challenges my way. These were that although my body liked the extra space it was not used to it. It took me a year for my mind to accept the change in the environment. As my body had been in a state of anxiety because of where we were before. So has only got used to it and now things will be changing at the end of 2022. Right now though that is up in the air.
February
This was a month of settling down and hoping to follow our dreams to a certain point. We were still in a lockdown so nothing had changed for me as I was again housebound. And February is the middle of winter it is the time when I go out the least in any case. So in that respect, I barely left the house. It was also a time to start the mental change for the hope of following the dreams we had and recuperating mentally from the stress of the move and Christmas.
March
So this was a month of waiting to find out if we could follow our dreams. So were quite stressed. The kids also were meant to be going back to school because it was deemed best they went back. Rather than homeschooling. But because they are young carers for me, it was decided that one of them should go back earlier due to their mental health.
The last few months for me nothÃng had changed for me with the exception that I was to see the people who help me be a more human person in my eyes as salons were slowly opening up.
April
This was a simple month as it was just a month that was just getting things done while waiting for an answer from the people who held our dreams in their hands. My cp over the last few months had been stable and we just spent time being together and I was writing my posts for this blog and finding that my provider was not as good as I thought it was.But struggled on
Final thoughts
This quarter may sound like the year was just a simple time of living and being while going through the year and life
There is a lot of changes in the world. None so much, as what is going on here at home. The future is brighter than it has been in a long time.
I realise that there has been dullness in my blog. Talk of time management and blocking because of Covid19 and the changes. But none of the talks of makeup and other things, that I am passionate about. However, the lack of freedom and other things made me morbid and unwilling to write about anything exciting. There are lots of things that are positive, happening now, making it a happier future. I am excited about it.
I am excited about the future despite aspects of uncertainty. Knowing that I am in some sort of control even if there are bits that I can't, it doesn't matter. I am feeling a lot better and things are arriving in my mind that I can write about.
I have been writing my blog in my home for twenty-three years. Things have been almost the same over the last five years. With the change of home, the transformation will be here too.
There has already been a small change that has happened. I cannot wait for you all to see it come to fruition in the next seasonal quarter.
Since writing this on my original provider things are definitely changing although the move I think is going to take a while longer. As we can't find a place that can take our cat. Who helps me keep calm when I feel anxious or depressed. So right now we are looking for somewhere.
This is what's going on at the moment. The COVID19 situation has changed here in the UK, and lots and lots of people have had their injections, whether they're, it's their first or their second one. I've had my second job yesterday because cerebral palsy is one of the neurological problems that COVID19 can affect, you, whether it be long term or short term.
We've had to be inside for so long, and this week. I'm recording this, They are opening up all the shops that were not opened for over a year now, and it's going to be a strange, strange sensation. When I go back out tomorrow. Because of an appointment, I will go straight down to town and straight back.
But going will be one of those things where I think, okay, great idea. but, you know, I'm thinking for everybody, particularly people with neurological, breathing problems, asthma or whatever. Masks are to be worn outside, and it shouldn't matter.
I understand the freedom of seeing people and everything else. But if you've got a cold or something, then it'd be best to cover your face, because you don't want to be giving it to other people who you who don't know, might have a weak immune system so that would be an issue. When things are happening like that, it's, it's more dangerous for us. Think about when you have worries like this, we've been stuck indoors for a long time, whether it's because of our disability, and the fact that things are now changing back to the normality of sorts.
The cerebral palsy side of things is going to get a lot harder. I did a dance class this morning. A 30-minute off my phone, and yes I should have done it during the time of moving, but I didn't feel like doing it because there was so much going on, mentally, physically that really, I couldn't consider doing that. It's too much trouble to think about doing things like that because of factors. You've got ways of having to cope. here are people who are constantly being stuck indoors, no matter what.
They may have a different condition so they don't want to be outside at all, and they're used to being indoors and hearing all this news, what happened over the last 18 months is going to be causing more anger, and worry about things because they're not sure what they're going to do. you know, then they're knowing they're going to have to go out and it's more anxious, timing again for us.
I've been lucky enough to go out a few times, you know, not other six months in our when it first lockdown, I stayed in. We were waiting to move which I've mentioned in another post,
which I will link up in my video as well. I've also done it so that, you know, it's been worrying. and now wasn't enough room, and this morning because I've managed to do a little bit of exercise. I felt better. Even though I've just had the job that I had yesterday, but it's not going to be sensible to go out with her party all the time. And make sure that you know you've got things going, and it's not fair for the way things are. It's not going to be easy in the future.
I don't see us with a disability to be reminded of too much because people are going to be doing what they did 100 years ago with the partying that happened in the 20s, the roaring 20s when they, when they had a lot of partying and stuff after the Spanish flu 100 years ago.
We've got things now which can help a lot quicker, ie the injections, and things like that. We've got to remember that it's not going to be easy for anyone, particularly those who have been stuck indoors because they've got a disability, and their male Mental Welfare is not going to be a brilliant moment. And that goes for everyone, too.
It's going to be, it's harder, I believe, for people who have not been out loud out, you know, it's not easy for some who have had to go out because they've had to be key workers, you know, there's been some Cp, people who I know who have had to go out to their store to local Tesco and be a front shot worker which is brilliant, and it's their freedom, but they were at a higher risk of getting the virus, same with any mental or breathing situation. That is not going to be fair, for people who wanted to be out and those people who are being who had been selfish not realising it will suddenly get to the point where actually.
Oh, right. Well, yeah, maybe I shouldn't have gone out so much. Okay, I've made that mistake, and won't be doing that again. Then they would be doing things like being more sensible but aren't you know, with more variants are coming out now of the virus and so that there are more chances of actually catching the catching COVID Again, but it should be proven, that being sensible falling, a rough idea of doing what you need, seeing, seeing the occasional framed, you know, for the mental issues that can happen would be great. I mean I know a lot of people doing the over zoom.
I didn't feel like that was an option to me because I'm much more of a tactile person. And it's important for me to realise that maybe I should have done more of that and which is why I am now doing these videos to put myself out of the situation and be more active, both verbally, out and about, internationally, online, rather than just in the house, or just locally. So, when things are more easy access, I suppose, when things are a bit more lifted. It will be a lot easier,
Right now we're only on stage three and open today, and that's Monday, the 17th of May. And there is a possibility of it being stalled. From this point, but that's understandable because of what's going on around the world. And so we have to think for ourselves and each other. Again, this is where equality comes in, and I want the talk of doing the sweetest men does style website is what I wanted to do, is by actually showing more equality. And so, if we treating everyone is equal, and realising that everyone is valuable and needed, it's more important for everyone to think, okay, right, it's my turn to stay in. If they need to go out, then that's fine.
Don't just think for yourself,
because there are so many more people out there who could be more vulnerable than you are.
