A Crazy Year in Retrospect Part 3

September

Like the last post, life had been pretty calm, and able to do things calmly, with no real stress. I had started to get the sensation of anxiety coming back. I knew that the calmness was beginning to come to the end. I know while writing, this. It is only short term. The feelings being back made me know that this will also affect me. By causing problems with my type of Cerebral Palsy.

October

This month was the same although the sense of anxiety was getting stronger and stronger. I had been feeling more and more anxious about the future. I did do the 1st step which was a kind of relief.  Yet the uncertainty of the future means my cerebral palsy has been affected. Yet I don’t know how just yet.

November

This month again had been a mixed bag of feelings. I was able to get Christmas almost completed before the actual event. The stress was beginning to start showing itself. Through tightness of muscles and the inability to wind down.

December

This month was the end of what was a fairly good year before a new year which is a transitional one, to say the least.

Final ideas

The whole year had been a good one on the whole. Cerebral palsy has been good and life despite the pandemic was good this year

 This is the end of the series on the year in retrospect.

A CrazyYear in Retrospection Part 2

 This is the continuing series of posts regarding my thoughts about the year. For myself before moving on about this year.

May

This month was quiet and was a month where I continued doing the things that made me feel better and recovering from the feelings of anxiety and fear that had been over me for so long. I didn’t realise until recently how pressured I had been whilst living in the previous place with the family. 

Covid hadn’t disrupted me that much as I hadn’t been out much during the winter and early spring. As the weather affects the way cerebral palsy causes issues for me in the season. So I was enjoying a bit of freedom but still limiting the amount I went out because of the pandemic 

June

This month was much the same as before and started looking after myself mentally and physically in some ways that I can. This included and still includes the following:

• Manicure

• Lashes tinted 

• Eyebrows tinted and tidied

• Hair cut

July

Again this was similar to the previous month. So it was relatively calm and the kids were coming to the end of their school year. The thing was the ability to say yes to what the kids wanted rather than say no all the time.

August

This month was the same as July in the sense that I was able to say yes to the kids, myself and my hubby.

 

Final thoughts

There was lots of freedom for me despite the pandemic. So I feel privileged to have been able to do the things I can while there are so many who have lost their jobs or life.

So We Are Coming Out The Other Side! Of this Pandemic!

We are coming out the other side! 

So it's coming to the end of 2021 and the world has been in the most horrific since the end of 2019 when the world first heard of COVID-19 and the global pandemic first started. I have spoken about this in various posts such as Is this going to be another groundhog year?

But is the new year ahead of going to be the same as the last 2? 

There was a comment made about previous pandemics that I realised was a good observation and that the average time a pandemic lasts is 3 years. The most notable one is the Spanish flu which I mentioned in keeping your distance to stay safe. And that was from December 1918 to the middle of 1921 towards the end of the year.

Right now

Since beginning to write this post there is another variation of COVID-19 that was discovered in South Africa very recently so things have become more difficult again.

But changes are happening all the time so it can be a real struggle to know what to do for the best.

 What can everyone do for now?

The simplest thing people can do is follow the simple rules below.

• Wear a mask on public transport

• Wear a mask in shops and restaurants unless eating and drinking.

• In enclosed places that you don’t usually go wear a mask.

• Keep your interactions as minimal as possible. But do keep an eye on the elderly and those who are vulnerable.

• Staying at home as much as you can.

• Have the injections and boosters

• Carry hand sanitiser and use it 

Some people won’t follow these but they are putting everyone at risk. So unless there is a valid reason like some kind of medical or physical reason then masks should be worn.

Moving forward!

I mentioned before that in some places people are wearing masks for other reasons such as pollution. This is evident, particularly in Japan and China. Where the pollution is more noticeable. So following the simple rules will make it easier and quicker for things to go back to a similar way as before.

Hope for the future?

There is always hope for the future but this depends on everyone who can take action. It also depends on what actions everyone takes.

What does this mean for the exempt?

The following is what is meant for us who are exempt. 

• Stay home as much as possible.

• Have the injections that help everyone.

• Limit your interactions with others.

I get it that limiting your interactions can make you feel lonely but try to make a routine of seeing someone in your network every day. Even if you don’t touch the people you see it's important to be in touch with them. So that could be through:

• Texts

• Phone calls,

• Zoom or face calls.

• Meet up at an open space or garden. 

• Meet at a spacious place. This might be a cafe or coffee place with lots of space.

What ??

So we are all going to be doing indoors? those of us who are indoors more than others may not find as much difference but those who are could follow some of the ideas that I suggest in How are you coping in these strange times

But that is up to you and those around you. But remember that it's not just your life that is being affected by your decisions. It is everyone on the planet.

Final thoughts!

My final thoughts on this are that it is up to everyone to make an informed decision. I will be doing everything I can to ensure that everyone I love and know will be safe.

What does 2022 have for me?

What I think it has?

I think the new year has a lot of good things happening. Not everything is going to be what I wanted it to be. That's ok though just the same as 2021. 

There, as I said, have been lots of changes in the way things are regarding my disability. I think that the changes will be positive for the future to a certain degree. I'm hoping to have the final place, but it may not happen. We'll see. That's ok though because there is always going to be positive and negative. No matter what.

What do I want from 2022 ?

All I want is a way of being able to be safe and yet not stressed out too much. I know that this is going to be a difficult year ahead with the way that my family is going to have a head regarding their own situation such as GCSEs and a new place. We don't know what could actually be happening. We just have to take it month by month. 

So that means that we have to think about what is going on each month and make a small plan so that we have a monthly plan rather than a big goal for the entire year as something we can grasp on to. 

And that's what I think is going to be something that is going to help me as a person with anxiety. But it's also a lesson that I need to learn.

What I don't want from 2022?

I don't want to disabled person to be so stressed out that I'm panicking in a day-to-day situation for everything that has to be dealt with. 

I can manage if things are the occasional hiccup, but if there are lots of things that are causing issues then I will be full of anxiety and not wanting to do anything and instead wanting to hide so that is a negative side of 2022. Knowing what my disability holds in general makes it a lot harder at times to realise what we can do and what can happen and what help we have available.

What will I be doing in 2022?

I will be getting ready for the new home sorting things out to get to that stage and before setting down hopefully in the new final home but we can't confirm or any of that for the next year until the end of the year.  I'm going to be tentative about moving in this time next year, ready for the new place. 

What next?

My plan for now is to take each task that makes the future safe and secure for me and my family. As I know that the future can be very uncertain yet I can make it as safe as I possibly can. That is all I can do for now.

 

December and what it has in store for me?

It's the final month of the year. Quiet often it's a crazy one, getting ready for Christmas.

This is the final month of a bit of space before the year of transition yet again. This year has been amazing in so many different ways.

There has been some problems with the world. What with the pandemic and the way it's still effecting the world in so many ways. 

A lot of things however going, back to normal, as I have mentioned in many of my other posts such as When change is coming and Moving on. 

Yet recently my brain has decided to almost shut down. I think that's because there's been so much going on that I haven't been able to really deal with things on a daily basis. And so my brain was in so much a disarray.

I have had to plan so much ahead for the future, because things are still up in the air despite being safe for now. I wish to be able just live from day to day rather than have to plan so much ahead. And that is something that I needed because there's only something's that I can plan, but not everything.

What do I think December has for me.

I am hoping that this month can be be a semi restful month with good memories for me and my family. As well as Christmas presents and time with outside members of the family that I don't often see throughout the year.

What do I want from December.

I really want this month just to be a peace and quiet so that I can just live from day to day because of my disability. And get ready for the next year and the future ahead.

What I don't want from December!

What I don't want is a month of stress and anxiety before the new year ahead. So I can manage everything going on in the new 

 

So the year has nearly finished! What a crazy one.

Oh my goodness what a crazy year this has been. A quarter of which has been in yet another lockdown because of the pandemic. If you didn’t know about it, where have you been?

This year has been a year of almost normality yet not! There have been things that have been shut, new rules to follow set by the government. Then more changes as some of the rules were reversed. And as I write more things are happening.  In the sense that other countries are opening up for us to travel to but not everywhere.

What has this year given me?

This year has given me a real sense of change in myself. Yes, I have cerebral palsy but the fact I moved house at the end of 2020. That was a big change in its self after 23 years in the same place. It was a positive move although there were challenges.

What hasn't this year given me?

The biggest thing is that it hasn't allowed me to get the dream home the way I wanted but that's ok. There are more changes ahead but they are for the future of me and my family. 

These have to be done in stages so that that's ok.

What do I think the rest of the year has got for me?

This year has got me a few lovely things as well as a few awesome memories. It also has been able to have some brilliant experiences that are still continuing.

and some not so good ones. But that's ok. Life has got to give both sides of things because that's what we as humans, disabled or not need as well as the food and drinks that we need to have to survive. But I'm not sure what the last few weeks are going to give me.

What has the year taught me?

I'm not sure about that point but I'm learning all the time and sometimes the lessons are not finished in one day. They may take weeks or months to actually learn the things that. But that's alright and it doesn't matter how long the lessons are needed. However, these lessons are not necessarily wanted despite being taught them anyway. And that's fine.

What did I want to learn?

That's an interesting question to have but I'm not sure exactly. The fact that I'm learning a lot more about how things have been and can be. These are long term lessons that I personally need to learn. Everyone's different but the lessons that are taught are universal ones that everyone should know. yet not everyone knows them all.

So what's next?

Who knows what is around the corner life has for me in the next year but I'm beginning to learn that despite all the best intentions things can and do go wrong even with planning.

Is This Going To Be Another Groundhog Year? Again!!

 It's still a lockdown in February. Nothing has changed since the beginning of Christmas 2020. Except everything has changed there are millions of people who have had their first immunisation jab to the virus. Yet millions are still waiting for their first.

HOW ARE YOU GETTING ON IN THIS LOCKDOWN.

You are not the only one who is struggling!

Remember everyone in this whole world is in a similar situation to yourself. So if you need to talk to people then do so. You can always contact me using email if you feel that you have no one to go to. Use your phone or the internet. If you can.

Listen to your favourite books or podcasts. Such as Sweetestmoonduststyle. If you don’t haven’t any then binge on your favourite movies or shows. By DVD or by streaming such as Netflix or Amazon Prime.

My favourite movies and shows are as follows:

1. The Post
2. Les Miserables
3. Picard
4. The Marvelous Mrs Maisel

Just to name a few.

My fave books are as follows:

1. Complete works of Jane Austen
2. Terry Pratchett Discworld Series
3. The Complete Sherlock Holmes

Although I read various types those are my go tos for comfort. I can put my mind in those places and be a visual observer of the story. Rather than going somewhere new and pay more attention to what is going on.

Therefore, this is my safe place mentally although I do read several different types of books.

Another thing to do is to listen to positive music. This is my Spotify List with music from the 40s up to now.

Or listen to some amazing positive podcasts. The following are my go-to positive shows if I really need a boost Be Positive Stay Positive and Every Day Positivity. Another Helpful podcast I listen to is Happy Place and this is done by Fearne Cotton. She also has written books that I love, giving tips on the inside chatter, negativity etc.

STILL, STRUGGLING WITH WHAT'S GOING ON?

It's ok to be in the mood that you are alone but you must realise that you are not alone. A way to resolve an issue would be to help the elderly or disabled locally if you can. But if you cant just ring them up so that they know that tyhe6y are not alone just like you.

It is different living with one or more people because you can talk to that person or people. There are times when you want to be silent and just recharge your batteries. This is a good idea especially as you sometimes clash emotionally and verbally.

You’re not the only one who is feeling like this right now. Everyone is to some degree. Remember that your well being is the first thing to think of before trying to help anyone else because if you don’t look after yourself then you will not be able to help anyone else.

So take a deep breath and take that first step to your self-care before anyone else.

WHATS NEXT!

I am writing this towards the end of the month and tonight the UK prime minister is laying out his next move for here. Hopefully, things will be heading to a positive future but no one truly knows what is in the future. Even before the virus made more problems for the world.

The virus has no bounds and does not pick any particular race, colour or religion so by looking after yourself and your family. If in a house with other people then ensure that you all work together and get this world back to some kind of normality.

I need to be in some kind of bubble because of cerebral palsy and luckily I am with my family. I miss going out to see my friends and getting fresh air. Winter is drawing to a close, spring is coming at what seems to be a quick pace. This is when I tend to go out more in any case because of the warmer weather and the way it eases my cerebral palsy. I still also listen and read. There are days that I feel completely worn out and just want to do nothing. That’s ok too!

Don’t panic too much and get your inoculation if you are offered it and just carry on protecting yourself and those you love until we get back to some kind of normality because I very much doubt that the world will be the same again.